Weeks Off, and Balance

I took an unintended hiatus from writing for this blog last week. It was probably Tuesday when I first realized that I hadn't written anything for "MHFH" in a few days, and I felt a surge of guilty anxiety when I realized it. As I was unusually busy, though, the thought didn't linger -- but it persistently returned throughout the week.

You see, I feel responsible for this blog, and rightly so. For one thing, it's my blog, plain and simple, and I've put a lot of time and effort into it. For another, I'm very aware of the fact that the content herein is my content; that is, it's my creation, with my name is attached to it. A relatively simple Google search of my name will now and forever reveal the existence of this blog. Given that discoverability, and given that I have a personal and professional life to attend to, I want the blog's content to be good.

On another note, I feel responsible to you -- again, rightly so. Mental health is serious stuff. It is, of course, possible and appropriate, in some cases, to foster insight and discussion of mental health through less serious means, but I've chosen to write about it with an earnest authorial voice. That means that I have a responsibility to take these posts seriously, and to do no harm by you.

I'm also ambitious, quite frankly. I don't necessarily have a goal in mind for this blog, per se, but I do want to distribute this, and other, work to a wide audience. Pursuant to that, then, I acknowledge the importance of writing well, and writing often.

So, again, I felt uneasy and anxious and irresponsible with each passing post-less day -- at first.

But then, an interesting transformation: my relationship to the thought changed -- or, put another way, my opinion of the fact that I hadn't written for this blog changed. My new responses to the awareness of my non-MHFH-writing were, and are, twofold:

1. Sometimes, the best thing to do is take a break. That's true of just about anything I can think of off the top of my head, and I'd assert it's especially true in mental health. Sometimes we just gotta do other things, know what I mean? For one, life rolls on, and things come up that demand our attention. For another, it's a good reminder that there is, and must be a life outside the consideration of mental health/self-help/psychology/etc. It's part of that little thing we call balance. We cannot long sustain our health, happiness, and well-being without some semblance of balance. Besides, the consideration of mental health/self-help/psychology is ostensibly engaged so that we can live our lives in a more personally satisfying manner.

2. A) I'm not that important. Anyone who reads this blog will go on living their own lives in the manner they see fit, regardless of whether I ever write another post again -- which is exactly how it should be; B) I do this because I believe my thoughts and posts and images are of value, and because, moreover, I like to share them; and C) I live a full, rich, and busy life. I am fortunate to have lots of interests, and lots of things I like to do. Sometimes, those things will take precedence over my self-imposed and admittedly arbitrary blogging schedule. And that's a good thing, as Martha Stewart says.

People who care about other people, and about the work they're doing, fall prey to burnout very easily. It requires conscious practice not to, actually. When you care deeply about the people and ideas you're serving, it's natural to throw yourself into it with everything you have. That's well and good. But it's like drawing water from a well: unless the water supply is steadily replenished, the well is going to run dry.

Unless we take the time to really, truly take care of ourselves, we will burn out -- and that's true for all of us, not just those of us involved in mental health work as patients or practitioners or writers or researchers, etc. We must find a way to give ourselves what we enjoy, what we relish, what gives us peace. It's our spiritual medicine. Each of us is different in that regard, surely. Some people need just a wee dose of it every day; others can go weeks or months without it, and then set a weekend aside and fill 'er up. Whatever it is for you, just do it.

This is a long, elliptical post, which is nice, because my thoughts tend to be that way. Let me just reemphasize what, for me, was the biggest revelation of this week of non-writing:

Balance is good. It might not be recognizable at first, and it might even be uncomfortable for awhile, but it's good. It's necessary. It's a balm for the soul.

Have a good one, folks. Thanks for reading.