Friday, August 24, 2012

Proceed!

I have another question for you, and this time it's related to resilience. We all experience disappointment; it's an inevitable part of life. Disappointment can be pretty big, as when a relationship fails, or we don't get the interview we wanted, or the purchase or sale of a home falls through. Disappointment can also be on a smaller scale: that movie you wanted to stream is only available on DVD, or the grocery store is out of your favorite flavor of ice cream. 

Whether on a big or small scale, disappointments can be disruptive. They can throw us for a loop, knock us off course, and put us in a negative frame of mind. With enough disappointment, it can sometimes feel as if the universe is conspiring against you, and the way forward, once so seemingly clear, can become hazy and uncertain. Our thinking may become muddled, and we may second-guess ourselves. 

These downward spirals can be difficult to overcome, especially when life -- pesky!! -- doesn't stop to give you a breather. Nope! Life moves on, obligations and all, whether you feel like you're ready or not. My question, then, is this:

How do you get yourself past the inevitable disappointment(s)? Or, put another way, what does resilience "look like" to you?

Enjoy your weekend. 

5 comments:

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    1. "Bowl-of-ice-cream" therapy is one of the best. :)

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  2. Usually I have a good cry after disappointment - and then remind myself that my disappointment is for selfish reasons - the result of me wanting something for myself or wanting someone to act/react in the same manner I would. But it is alright to feel sorry for yourself time and again. With big disappointments it is important to continue on with your daily routine - humans thrive on routines, it is how we exist when our mental/emotional state fails us.

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    1. Though my thoughts and/or actions to overcome disappointment generally vary based on the general "size" of the situation, they are more or less quite similar. When faced with a seemingly large disappointing situation I often times take a mecessary period of time upset about whatever it may be. I have found it may help to communicate my disappointment with someone close to me. What comes next is usually a plan of sorts. Whether it be to keep trying other routes or options, or asking said close person for help in brainstorming other routes to reach the goal. On a smaller scale I have found it often helps to visualize the big picture, or the "grand scheme of things". I often ask remind myself to look at the big picture when confronting a situation that results in any degree of disappointment. I think it's important to keep allow yourself some time to be upset or disappointed, even embrace it. However, don't forget to keep things in perspective.

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    2. I really like the way you approach things, and I agree -- with you and with Anonymous -- that it's "alright" and "necessary" (as you both said) to take time and give oneself space to just be disappointed. It's a real and valid response, and it ought to be felt and embraced, not pushed away or glossed over. That said, I really like your process of visualizing the "big picture," or "grand scheme of things." Perspective helps to soothe acute, unpleasant experiences; but it also helps a person stay rooted in reality; i.e., "this too shall pass, and it's not the end of the world." Life goes on.

      Thanks!!

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